Going down, down, down…

June 18, 2008

Why haven’t I written in a while, one asks.  Okay, I get it, no one actually asked…

I love my kids.  But they are currently trying to find, amidst 4,524 stuffed animals, all of their pokemon stuffed animals.  For some reason.  I just know that it involves a lot of screeching.  “Mine!”  “No, MINE!”  “Where did you LEAVE whateverthehellcrazynamedpokemon?”  It also involves tearing apart closets and bins and beds.  And inexplicably scotch tape.  Which scares me.

If I were sending a telegram, it would read something like this:

Summer currently killing me STOP Kids destroying home Stop Going under for about the sixth time Stop Send vodka Stop Now Stop

Yours in abject terror and frustrated exhaustion Stop

Please, please STOP!

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6 Responses to “Going down, down, down…”

  1. Lock them in the house. Drive to ours. Drink vodka. Nap. Go home.

  2. bethkoruna said

    I’m there, brother. Right now.

  3. kjames said

    remember how greta lost picachu’s tail in their room? she was asking about it the other day.

  4. bethkoruna said

    OMG — I totally forgot about that. Apparently, our house eats all types of pokemon. Never did find that stinkin’ tail, either.

  5. Andy Whitman said

    The sad thing is that these dynamics don’t seem to improve with age. Twenty-two year olds and nineteen year olds still fight in ways that are remarkably similar to your two boys.

    I love my kids. Individually. But there is some sort of horrific, Satan-driven dynamic that is unleashed when they are together. I want them to go back to school. Or I will go to school and they can have the house. Either way.

  6. Beth said

    How about we give the kids one of our houses and you and me and Kate and Tim stay in another? We can sit around, read books, drink glasses of wine, and just generally, be quiet and pleasant. I promise not to yell at anyone over some damned stupid thing. In fact, I’ll just plan on whispering.

    They can have our house — it’s already half trashed as it is.

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