February 21, 2007

I’ve received the ALL CAPS e-mail. Council sent me back the white (and only the white, buddy) copy of my T-2 form with the appointed time for Cookie pick-up. Yes, Council knows where I live.

It’s time to Do-si-Do All About the town. Wanna Tagalong and pick up 132 cases of Cookies tomorrow. That’s 1,546 boxes of Cookies to you and me.

The Great Debate: Apparently girls from counties other than Franklin received their Cookies earlier in this week and began distributing them to their buyers. And this has caused parental Consternation and Grumbling as to why our little troop doesn’t have Cookies yet. Ah, but you see, Council makes these Decisions. And one does not question Council.

Apparently it will go Something like This: I will drive the mini-van (seats folded down, free of trash and children — the Troop Cookie Guide actually says that) to the Cookie Loading Area. I am not to Load Cookies myself — as the Troop Cookie Guide says, people are there to serve me. I MAY get out of my vehicle to count the Cases of Cookies being placed in the back of my van, though they would prefer I have a Passenger to do that, while I sit at the wheel and listen to my I-pod. But no matter. I am to have a placard (ideally the Outside Back cover of my Troop Cookie Guide — and these caps I’m not making up) with my TROOP Number on the driver’s side, and I am to have with me my pink copy of the Volunteer Responsibility Form, which of course indicates that though I am a lowly volunteer, I am Very Responsible. Responsible enough for over $4,500 worth of Cookies. Pray that I do not subsequently get Car-Jacked. I am also to have my Circle Sheet which contains a color-coded chart of how many Cases of each Cookie type we should receive. After the Cookies are Loaded Up, I am to sign the green copy of the T-2 and I’m on my way.

Then I cautiously proceed Home where somehow 132 Cases must be unloaded into my living room. We were told not to leave Cookies in the garage because of risk (however Infinitesimal) of petroleum poisoning. Then I will Sort Cookies and place them in Piles designated for each girl. Then people who complained that Cookies had not yet arrived will take Several Days to pick up their Cookies from me.

In another post — I am going to share Verbatum what the Troop Cookie Guide has to say about Cookie Complaints. It’s something for you all to Look Forward to. Sadly, it is better than anything I could ever come up with on my funniest day.

Oh, and because of the various Executive Decisions I’ve made over the last two days, I am now calling myself the Cookie Czar.


3 Responses to “TOMORROW IS D — I MEAN — C DAY!!”

  1. kjames said

    so… how did it go?

  2. andy anderson said

    Oh yes… do not question council. My mother was also a Cookie Mom and at one point my sister managed to sell over 300 boxes of cookies herself (how I shall never know, I was not the salesman of the family). Our house was beseiged with cookies on more than one occasion.

  3. Beth Koruna said

    “Beseiged with cookies” (though you SHOULD capitalize it, you know) — yep, that pretty much describes my life this past week.

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